Giving of Grace to One Another

(Originally published on LinkedIn.)

Recently I was browsing through a binder that I used when I was involved in some leadership training (focused on comprehensive school improvement / change leadership) and I came across the following quote from Patrick Dolan (author of Restructuring Our Schools):

What we need, very often, more than anything else, is a “grace” with one another. This grace comes from understanding how difficult this business is, and from making the very best assumptions about people and their desire to change, understanding the reality of past experiences and the culture so often in place. It is hard to make these changes, and we will never get it right at the very beginning… It is the giving of grace to one another that very often allows us to move through the early sticking moments and gather enough momentum… [to] stay the course.

I found this particular quote very striking because what it describes was familiar to me and it put into words what I felt at a time when I was part of a highly functional school improvement team in an environment where everyone was energized, enthusiastic, and inspired to do what was (and continues to be) very hard work. This sense of grace (unmerited favor) is exactly what we need a whole lot more of if we want to have hope of making the changes we need to make within ourselves as well as within our education system.

At the heart of this concept is the fact that we will not always agree on the best plan of action, the best school or district structure, the best instructional model, etc., but for the sake of our students we must be able to work with one another in a manner where we all feel supported, affirmed, and appreciated for what we each bring to the table.

What does “giving of grace to one another” look like in the context of school or district-wide improvement?

  • Supporting one another through all initiatives… never undermining anyone else’s efforts even if we disagree with the initiative…
  • Rolling up our sleeves and diving head-first into the work together…
  • Trusting each other — REALLY trusting each other — especially when we disagree about methods, processes, or plans…
  • Listening to each other’s ideas and giving opposite viewpoints equal airtime and consideration… Trying out each other’s ideas instead of immediately criticizing…
  • Having compassion and forgiveness…
  • Being supportive of each other when initiatives don’t work out as planned… Helping each other problem-solve & troubleshoot when ideas or projects don’t work out as planned…
  • No egos, no blame…
  • Providing positive humor when things get difficult…
  • Playing “devil’s advocate” in a supportive way with one another…
  • Never saying “I told you so…”
  • Providing support to one another as we each go through our individual learning processes…
  • Being open to saying “I don’t know” and then asking for help or guidance…
  • Approaching the work — especially the most difficult work — with a sense of adventure…
  • Approaching each other with acceptance and appreciation…

What else would you add? What does “grace” within our work look like to you?